funky doo

The Con of Christmas...hear me out!!

This post will also appear on the family blog here.

This has been a post in formation for weeks and I was never sure I felt brave enough to write it in a real way for people to see...but Bishop Nick Baines has got in before and dealt with the stick over the weekend...so I feel a bit like I'm jumping on the bandwagon - but hey, we all do that in the world of blogging!

So, check out Nick's post here Grumpy Bishop. He's recently published a book which I'll say now, just like all the media who have entered the scrum of interviewing him, I haven't read yet. But based on this post, he is from the same stable as me - if you'll excuse the pun! (Cos it was probably a cave!!)

My problem with Christmas (I love it really, don't get too worried!!) came with the arrival of M 3 years ago - her first Christmas didn't really matter as she was only 10 days old. But come her first birthday, followed rapidly by Christmas Day, it was very difficult not to get caught up in the assumption that Father Christmas would be visiting our house in the dead of night and delivering presents.

I love the idea and the legends of Father Christmas and the root of it's story in St Nicholas who was a 3rd century miracle worker, renowned for secret gift giving and whose feast day is this Sunday. But I have a problem with the commonly held assumption that Santa (who is a character developed by cartoonist Thomas Nash in 19th century America and then taken on by mighty Coca Cola), who in contrast to St Nicholas is a jolly, red faced, red suited old man living in the North Pole, are one and the same.

The titles Father Christmas and Santa Claus seem to be interchangeable - indeed in the North East where we used to live, Santa is often Santee (try it with a Geordie accent!!)

But the roots of these characters - fictional, historical, the stuff of legend, whatever - are very different and portray different aspects of the Gospel and the Christmas story. Whilst I am not going to go down the extreme line of saying the whole thing is a lie and Father Christmas can't possibly visit every house in the world in one night etc., I am going to make sure that the traditions we have and the story we tell is faithful whilst also being magical and not ultimately confusing to a 6/7/8 year old in years to come.

Ultimately - I want M to understand that she receives gifts, not because she has been a good girl, but because we love her and because we want to celebrate the wondrous story of Jesus' birth and his life given out for her and for us. It always has everything to do with GRACE - and giving gifts is not because we are good, but in fact the opposite - but we are LOVED, by God and by one another and so we can bless one another...that is our call as disciples.

I HATE it when people ask small children whether they have been good this year and if Santa is going to come - of course they haven't been good...they are small children!! But in our house, M will get a small stocking of presents, outside her door, from us to open in bed and Father Christmas will have visited the house overnight - drinking a bit of something, scoffing a mince pie and maybe leaving some gold coins as the original St Nicholas is said to have done. All her other presents will come from us - real people who love her and know her and want to be part of the pleasure of giving gifts as she is in the giving of gifts to others.

 

Ok, so that's the Santa bit done...

Now a quote from Nick Baine's blog, referenced above: Now, some commentators say that Christmas is about sentiment (feeling), nostalgia and ‘magic’. They say that simple carols are great for children to begin to learn the story. Absolutely right. But the people arguing this are not children, but adults who want to stay as children when it comes to matters of God and faith and so on. Think like a child when you are a child, but, for goodness’ sake, grow up when you are an adult.

 

I find it ironic that for the rest of the year, a majority of our population want nothing to do with Christian tradition in any way but suddenly at Christmas they become hugely defensive of anything being different or changing or being criticised. The depth of understanding of what Christmas and this huge celebration are really all about is missing - and I see 2 reactions as I go about my work and experience life.

Some churches and Christians do nothing to celebrate Christmas...no carols or Christmas services or trees or anything which is vaguely pagan or rooted in tradition - everything just carries on as normal until the BIG DAY. Missing out Advent, in my opinion is the real shame here...but that's another issue! 

On the other extreme, there are many churches and Christians who do everything traditionally and don't question 'why' or whether it's helpful. I remember one of my first parish posts and the whole of December being taken up with either visiting or hosting Carol Sevices or nativity plays - by schools, Townswomen's Guild (yes seriously!), nurseries etc. You did want to tear your hair out by the end and it had slightly lost it's magic in the repetition.

 

My reaction is to try and do something in the middle - I love Christmas carols but hate Away in a Manger and the 'How silently' verse of O Little Town of Bethlehem. Mary was NOT silent in labour, OK!

We'll be having a tree even though it stems from pagan tradition...(!)because it forms a focal point in our home for Christmas celebrations and it is a precious family occasion to buy the tree and decorate it. We will feed people, host people, visit with people - mainly those we know or are related to, although when M is older we endeavour to be spending time with those who don't have the advantages of Christmas traditions and family that we are blessed with.

 

The difficulty of taking an extreme reaction to Christmas traditions and popular culture is that you get bah humbuged by everyone else...which is difficult to take, in what is supposed to be a season of goodwill after all!! But if we Christians can't communicate seriously the true meaning of Christmas, then how can we expect those who only take part in the traditions once a year to really know what we're all about??

+Nick continues: The ‘magic’ of Christmas is fine – up to a point. But ask any clergy and they will tell you about the ways in which Christmas is hard for many people and how the ‘magic’ makes it harder. It is for them that the reality of Christmas hits home: that God has not remained a million miles above contradiction, but opted in to the muck and messiness of the world and meets us where we are – in the vulnerability of the baby in Bethlehem. To tell that story is not to be miserable – but the opposite.

I am just not prepared to encourage people to live in a fantasy world, but doing my job as a Christian bishop in calling people back to the original story. Grasp it – and then celebrate hard and fully. I’ll be belting out the carols and watching the nativity plays along with the rest of them. But I will also be living in the real world and engaging my brain.

+Nick - I'm with you. I'll be doing mobile carolling on 20th December, going into London and experiencing the Christmas lights and soaking up the excitement. I'll be making mince pies and sausage rolls and wrapping presents and sneaking about on Christmas Eve, stopping Andy from squeezing presents and we'll probably be eating and drinking too much. But I hope in the midst of all that, I'll be reminded of why we get to celebrate this amazing event - because it changed the world, it changed my world and I want it to change the world of my daughter and her friends and our families and our community because we tell it how it really is...if you take the 'text' out of 'context' - what are you left with??

Comments awaited!!

what's new??

Silence has descended here on funky doo for a wee while because - well, I haven't felt too funky!!

2 weeks ago tomorrow, I managed to injure my back and have been struggling with mobility, pain and general frustration ever since. Without going into all the horrendous details, the main trigger was just pure and simple parenting...putting M into her buggy at the park, twisting and bending at the same time to sling her shoes into the basket at the bottom and.....owwww!

I laid out for a couple of days, had the doctor over when it wouldn't go away, got some Valium (which was nice and soothing!) and thought it would all go away in a couple of days....ha ha ha ha!

I just got back driving today, 13 days later. I have had to cancel a lot of work commitments because I couldn't get there or even if I could, I wouldn't have been able to set up/speak/present/stand to do what I had to do...I never cancel, well not for something like this where I am perfectly well apart from being unable to get up or sit down!

In my time at home, I have been trying to do useful things, which aren't the usual every day things like hoovering and dishwasher-undoing!! That was impossible...but I have been making a claim for my stolen bag a few weeks ago now, getting ahead on some Falcon Camp preparation, lots of admin although haven't tackled the filing tray as that would involve bending! I did get to the Bradwell Pilgrimage on Saturday (Independence Day!) which I was pleased about as I have spent the last year on the planning committee, doing the website and publicity and was coordinating the Youth Zone on the day. In the end, it was more low key than I had imagined but that was probably good for me and everyone else, as it pretty much ran itself and I could observe and heckle from the sidelines!! I was so grateful for Stuart from Bar n Bus Trust and Jamie from Legacy Rayleigh who brought along their equipment and to the brilliant youth workers and volunteers who served that day in the blazing heat!! Phil, Dave, Lucy, Donna, Megan, Shaun, Lewis, Lee and John...thanks a million!!

This week has been slightly better as I have improved each day. Tuesday was a bit of a '2 steps forward, 1 step back' as I woke up in a lot more pain having overdone it on Monday. Tuesday I had to cancel everything in my diary and felt very yucky, upping the painkillers again and feeling generally 'hemmed in' from lack of interaction and activity outside the house. Yesterday, Wednesday, I went out to Suffolk (with AP as my chauffeur!) to the Eastern Region of Diocesan Youth Officer's meeting and lunch, which was very nice. I didn't feel too uncomfortable sitting in the car or at the table so that was an achievement and it was good to catch up with everyone and ease myself back in a little. A wide ranging conversation at Elveden Estate (yummy Chicken Ceaser Salad!) included issues around participation, the new Youth and Children's National Strategy, the Church of England Youth Council and a round up of what is going on in each Diocese and a chance to pray for one another.

So today, I finally feel almost pain free, just needing a couple of Nurofen at lunch time. I feel blessed in many ways to have been forced to slow down. God has his ways of making us hear him when all we seem to be doing is just 'getting on with it'. (Those Kairos moments - LifeShapes Circle! I'm learning!) I hadn't really stopped since half term and looking back at my diary, I had only had 1 weekend off since February, apart from the weekends we were travelling to our holiday. I was initially so frustrated that a weekend off had turned into a weekend of pain and being stuck in bed, but once I accepted it, I have enjoyed some solitude and silence, time on my own which I am not always good at, a chance to read and particularly to continue my reflections on my time in Sheffield, on the LifeShapes and The Order of Mission (TOM). I have been writing some posts on all this and keep thinking they are about ready to publish, but they are not quite!! Watch this space.

Other highlights of the last few weeks have been Andy's cooking of which there has been a lot more (lovely fresh stir fry's and flavoursome marinated meats!!), speaking to lovely Emily King on the phone in Tennessee (who also directed me to this website). We miss them both heaps and hope to see them again in 2011 sometime...that's the plan! Also a very funny night with our Giraffe group on Sunday involving cometitive Jenga competitions and a domino rally too!

As well as that, Hubby and I have had more time to talk, we haven't had to schedule 'money evenings' or date nights as normal because I've been here more and that has been really nice. We will be making sure that when we're at Soul Survivor B in a few weeks time that we are disciplined about having our mornings together when M is at her kids group...praying, talking, chatting over a cuppa and going to teaching. We have a lot to process at the mo - not just the TOM stuff but also planning ahead for youth in the autumn term and dreaming and scheming!

So, I'll sign off for now and go and get my daughter from her childminder - a small thing, but I haven't done that for nearly 3 weeks and it's such a precious thing...seeing her excitement at telling me what she has done at Kiko's and talking and singing on the way home.

Have a great evening! xx

Monday 29th June 2009

the weekend that was: I returned from my CEOP training on Thursday night and my dad arrived to stay soon after. Pops retired from the London Fire Brigade about 5 years ago and since then he has been indulging his passion for sailing (anything from dinghy's in a man made lake to Atlantic trips to Antigua!) as well as working in a wine merchants and doing various other bits and pieces like DIY for us and others. He's been away recently on a 4 leg trip from the south coast down to Croatia and he leaves on the final leg this week. He was having grand-daughter withdrawal symptoms so he came over and we had a lovely evening eating in the garden and catching up.

Friday, he and I and M went into Maldon and the Pirate Ship at Prom Park...whilst there I bent over to put something in the bottom of M's buggy and managed to do something to my back...Friday afternoon was interesting - put M down for a nap and realised that I really couldn't properly move or bend down at all...Popped some pills and sat down for an hour or so but by the time Andy came home, I was quite immobile and very frustrated.

Saturday was an unplanned day off - the leaders training which was due to take place with the Sophia Network had been cancelled due to lack of numbers so we were planning a lovely family weekend in the garden, pottering about and catching up on time together - but it was not to be. I was laid up in bed, M fell down the stairs, bashed her nose and was so exhausted by the whole thing that she went for a nap just at the point that A was going to take her swimming! In the end, we all just crashed out for the day before A went out to Prom Park again to meet our friends E&K and daughter A and to bring them back here for dinner and a sleepover! I was feeling a bit better by then, got myself in (and thankfully, out!) of the shower and we enjoyed a Malaysian Curry and some Mah Jong!

Sunday morning dawned, I was immobile again and realised there was no way I would make it there and back to Walthamstow for RevAP's ordination...which I was very gutted about. So, another boring, flat out day continued, with A & M at church I did some bits and pieces at home, but couldn't hoover or do the dishwasher or anything mildly useful! A was preaching at All Saints Church Maldon where they are piloting a new monthly informal evening service on Sunday nights, so he was busy preparing for that during the afternoon while M napped. When he got back we caught up with the season finale of CSI:New York- OMG! Brilliant and cannot believe we have to wait until the next series to find out what happens...

It's now Monday morning and my back is no better - so called the doctor out who said I have pulled muscles all along the base of my back and a number of trapped nerves, so he's prescribed Valium (!) and some anti inflammatory drugs as well as telling me I shouldn't sit or stand for longer than 20 minutes at a time, shouldn't drive or lift M! Brilliant! This could be an interesting week!

where i am at the moment: in the dining room. Having got downstairs initially this morning, and had the consultation with the doctor, I can't get upstairs again so I'm on the youth lap top instead of my work one!

on my to-do list this week: the to do list has slightly changed from this morning! I'm now organising cover for me for this weekend's Bradwell Pilgrimage as I won't be able to be as active as I'd hoped. Thankfully I have a team already lined up of amazing youth workers and volunteers so we should be alright - I'll just have to sit on the sidelines and bark orders! I'm also taking the opportunity of immobility to catch up on some admin tasks, get a few jobs done for Falcon Camp and various other little bits and pieces - but only for 20 minutes stretches!!

procrastinating about: nothing, I feel as though this week is going to be the complete opposite - all the things I need to do I can't do, rather than putting them off!! I am not good at being bored, but as some of my lovely Hub youthworkers have already pointed out, I need to learn from my own teaching about Deep Rest! Seriously, I know how bad chronic back pain can be and I am going to do my best to rest well and get properly better otherwise I know this could be a recurring problem. 

book i’m in the midst of: Fortune's Rocks still from last week, also started Jesus Wants to Save Christians by Rob Bell which I have had for a while but it got nabbed by A and he's only just given it over (after reading 3 times!) so that's a good review. A also bought me Marie Claire and it came with a free novel so I might get into that this week to ease the boredom!

music that seemed to catch my attention this past week: enjoyed Glastonbury on TV this weekend, particularly the Ting Tings and Blur's comeback...

next trip: nothing until Falcon Camp in 4 weeks time arrrrrgggghhhh!

stuff I'm into on TV/films right now: CSI I've already mentioned and when one series ends, another begins! Sky+ is set to record CSI: Miami from Tuesday night. Also watched the first in the Revelations series on Channel 4 last night, all about the Alpha course. Maybe I'll blog about that later this week...but the presenter irritated me a lot!

Youth work done/upcoming: Bradwell Pilgrimage this weekend, engaging with young people at this annual family event, as well as Giraffe on Sunday night and visiting two youth groups next week, hopefully the back will be better by then.

What did you eat this weekend?? Malaysian Curry (Gordon Ramsey's), Linguine with Broccoli and Stilton, Ploughman's lunch with lovely local ham from Buntings (our new best friends, they have just started doing online orders and delivery! yay!)...and I made the breakfast seed bars from Phil Vickery's Gluten Free cooking book which are yummy. Did them with condensed Caramel which made a change, very moreish!

the weekend that was: I returned from my CEOP training on Thursday night and my dad arrived to stay soon after. Pops retired from the London Fire Brigade about 5 years ago and since then he has been indulging his passion for sailing (anything from dinghy's in a man made lake to Atlantic trips to Antigua!) as well as working in a wine merchants and doing various other bits and pieces like DIY for us and others. He's been away recently on a 4 leg trip from the south coast down to Croatia and he leaves on the final leg this week. He was having grand-daughter withdrawal symptoms so he came over and we had a lovely evening eating in the garden and catching up.

Friday, he and I and M went into Maldon and the Pirate Ship at Prom Park...whilst there I bent over to put something in the bottom of M's buggy and managed to do something to my back...Friday afternoon was interesting - put M down for a nap and realised that I really couldn't properly move or bend down at all...Popped some pills and sat down for an hour or so but by the time Andy came home, I was quite immobile and very frustrated.

Saturday was an unplanned day off - the leaders training which was due to take place with the Sophia Network had been cancelled due to lack of numbers so we were planning a lovely family weekend in the garden, pottering about and catching up on time together - but it was not to be. I was laid up in bed, M fell down the stairs, bashed her nose and was so exhausted by the whole thing that she went for a nap just at the point that A was going to take her swimming! In the end, we all just crashed out for the day before A went out to Prom Park again to meet our friends E&K and daughter A and to bring them back here for dinner and a sleepover! I was feeling a bit better by then, got myself in (and thankfully, out!) of the shower and we enjoyed a Malaysian Curry and some Mah Jong!

Sunday morning dawned, I was immobile again and realised there was no way I would make it there and back to Walthamstow for RevAP's ordination...which I was very gutted about. So, another boring, flat out day continued, with A & M at church I did some bits and pieces at home, but couldn't hoover or do the dishwasher or anything mildly useful! A was preaching at All Saints Church Maldon where they are piloting a new monthly informal evening service on Sunday nights, so he was busy preparing for that during the afternoon while M napped. When he got back we caught up with the season finale of CSI:New York- OMG! Brilliant and cannot believe we have to wait until the next series to find out what happens...

It's now Monday morning and my back is no better - so called the doctor out who said I have pulled muscles all along the base of my back and a number of trapped nerves, so he's prescribed Valium (!) and some anti inflammatory drugs as well as telling me I shouldn't sit or stand for longer than 20 minutes at a time, shouldn't drive or lift M! Brilliant! This could be an interesting week!

where i am at the moment: in the dining room. Having got downstairs initially this morning, and had the consultation with the doctor, I can't get upstairs again so I'm on the youth lap top instead of my work one!

on my to-do list this week: the to do list has slightly changed from this morning! I'm now organising cover for me for this weekend's Bradwell Pilgrimage as I won't be able to be as active as I'd hoped. Thankfully I have a team already lined up of amazing youth workers and volunteers so we should be alright - I'll just have to sit on the sidelines and bark orders! I'm also taking the opportunity of immobility to catch up on some admin tasks, get a few jobs done for Falcon Camp and various other little bits and pieces - but only for 20 minutes stretches!!

procrastinating about: nothing, I feel as though this week is going to be the complete opposite - all the things I need to do I can't do, rather than putting them off!! I am not good at being bored, but as some of my lovely Hub youthworkers have already pointed out, I need to learn from my own teaching about Deep Rest! Seriously, I know how bad chronic back pain can be and I am going to do my best to rest well and get properly better otherwise I know this could be a recurring problem. 

book i’m in the midst of: Fortune's Rocks still from last week, also started Jesus Wants to Save Christians by Rob Bell which I have had for a while but it got nabbed by A and he's only just given it over (after reading 3 times!) so that's a good review. A also bought me Marie Claire and it came with a free novel so I might get into that this week to ease the boredom!

music that seemed to catch my attention this past week: enjoyed Glastonbury on TV this weekend, particularly the Ting Tings and Blur's comeback...

next trip: nothing until Falcon Camp in 4 weeks time arrrrrgggghhhh!

stuff I'm into on TV/films right now: CSI I've already mentioned and when one series ends, another begins! Sky+ is set to record CSI: Miami from Tuesday night. Also watched the first in the Revelations series on Channel 4 last night, all about the Alpha course. Maybe I'll blog about that later this week...but the presenter irritated me a lot!

Youth work done/upcoming: Bradwell Pilgrimage this weekend, engaging with young people at this annual family event, as well as Giraffe on Sunday night and visiting two youth groups next week, hopefully the back will be better by then.

What did you eat this weekend?? Malaysian Curry (Gordon Ramsey's), Linguine with Broccoli and Stilton, Ploughman's lunch with lovely local ham from Buntings (our new best friends, they have just started doing online orders and delivery! yay!)...and I made the breakfast seed bars from Phil Vickery's Gluten Free cooking book which are yummy. Did them with condensed Caramel which made a change, very moreish!

stunned silence and veggie heaven!

I've felt a bit blank the last few weeks, hence the silence from the funky doo camp. It's been a weird few weeks and since Bompa died, I feel like I've been on permanent catch up, only just getting on top of piles of paper and lists of 'to do' this morning, supposedly my day off....

However, this weekend has lots of space and time to chill in it which I'm looking forward to. I'll save the details of what we're doing for my Monday update!!

Last week was busy and hectic, but restful too. Had the Sophia Network Regional Gathering in Walthamstow on Monday which was successful in many ways, despite small numbers. People dropped like flies on Monday morning, so there were only 8 of us to eat but it was good morning none the less. My friend Ondine had done some fantastic, healthy, tasty food for us which we tucked into after a Bible Study on the Emmaus Road led by Rachel Heathfield and some worship led by Jenny Baker. Thanks to those who came and supported and look forward to the next Regional Day on 27th June in Benfleet for female youth workers and their mentees/upcoming female leaders.

Martyn Joseph last weekend was awesome, really enjoyed introducing my sister and her husband to music I have loved for so long. He did lots of stateside songs, influenced by his time at the many and huge folk festivals over there. He also tried out some new material on us, which was excellent so we're excited about the new album whever it happens.

I've spent quite a lot of the week at the desk or computer doing training planning for next weekend and the week after, and while doing that have been investigating back up options online. We had an external hard drive which held all our music and to cut a long story short, this is no longer in existence... :-( So, we've been re-uploading all our CD's and getting back on track and trying to source and different back up system. We've fallen on MP3 tunes who have Locker Sync which scans your computer for music and adds it to an online locker. It's pretty good but a bit tricky if you have as much music as we have so we're just waiting for them to upgrade our account to hold more GB's. We're using StoreGate for our documents and photos.

Anyone got better options or simpler systems?? Your ideas gratefully received, despite my blogging ability I'm not really very computer savvy!!

Finally for tonight, our new veggie patch is coming along very nicely. We don't have a big garden, but we only have a toddler so we've sacrificed some lawn for a 3m by 1.5m veggie patch which Andy is enjoying 'doing up'. He's fenced it off tonight and mixed in some of our lovely home made compost and we are growing various bits and pieces in the conservatory from seedlings that my Dad provided. I'll take some photos soon and post them up!

what did you eat this weekend?

Two people asked me this weekend about what we had cooked and eaten at home...so I thought I might add that to my Monday updates in future weeks...

but for ease today, I'll let you know on this seperate post:

Friday: Turkey Stroganoff with Rice (made up recipe based loosely on this, using sour cream, chicken stock and some chillies for bite) I used raw turkey and cooked and browned ahead instead of leftovers. Disappointing if I'm honest. Will add more garlic and herbs next time.

Saturday: Andy did us (me, him and Shaun) some homemade soup from the freezer for lunch and then we had a pasta, mushroom and tomato bake thingy for supper - made up recipe!

Sunday: Potato, Courgette, Leek and Feta Tortilla with crispy bacon. (fed me, Andy, Lewis and Shaun).Not sure where I got this recipe, (just realised and here's the link) but it's pretty simple and delicious with a simple salad. Used some left over carrots in it too, but have used peas and sweetcorn and baby corn. Things like potatoes and carrots need par boiling but everything else is a chuck in dream! 

Now - need to work on menu for the week as I'm going to butcher later...hmmm, fancy sausages?!

So, what did you eat this weekend - let's share ideas and make each other's mouths water!! I'm hoping for some inspiration from you otherwise silent readers!! leave your comments below....

ho ho hootenanny!

hi! it's been a while but Christmas is my excuse!! I am sitting here, at home, alone while Andy is out and aboutwith Matilda at the sales and doing a few other jobs. I am peopled out! This season seems to have gone on for a long while - beginning with Matilda's 2nd birthday back in the wilds of December and continuing with visits to Surrey, flights to Newcastle, then Durham, Washington and back home again. We then had people for dinner every night between Sunday and last night(Friday)...phew! We did manage to get rid of most of the 'bad' food yesterday at our OPen House which makes today a start the diet day...

Enough of that! The new year of work now beckons and it's starting to loom large. I have plans, big plans, to change lots of things, do things better and differently and be more efficient. I could share them with you here...but I haven't quite formulated it all yet...I have cleared my white board tho, so that's a start!

I was instant chatting on Facebook with my friend Phil, a student pastor out in the States and he has just started a new blog www.youthworktalk.com. He's keen to hear feedback and to interact with readers, so do take a look and join the conversation!

That's all for now - I am going to make the most of my alone time and do something different that computering...so Happy New Year and talk soon!

boredom

I'm wondering whether what I write about on here is all that interesting? I've felt a bit bored myself recently...not sure if that's a response to a busy, hectic and exciting summer and the getting back to reality...or something else...

I have had 2 terrible migraines this week which didn't feel too nice...never had one before so two was a bit of a bummer. Took Wednesday off to recuperate on my own at home which I kinda enjoyed - full of boring activities like washing, ironing and tidying piles of paper. Essential but boring and satisfying all at the same time.

Overall it's been a quiet week work wise which has given me the space to relax and try and remove any stress causing the headaches...but the pressure pumps up from now on as various training courses I am delivering start next weekend and Andy P and I are working together on some events across the Diocese. (my) Andy starts his Street Pastors training in November, which does give me some enforced time at home as we've made a decision to try not to add to Matilda's other childcare hours. Matilda and I are having fun together at the minute as he vocabularly increases each day - she also has a very dirty giggle and she laughs a lot which makes me laugh, which makes her laugh...

Tonight we have all the children's and youth work leaders from church over for an Indaba - a swahili word meaning gathering, fellowship, discussion. We want to gather this team together in our role as coordinators and feed them lovely desserts (!) and begin to develop vision and team to take the youth work forward in a fresh way. So I'm looking forward to tonight and have made a lemon and lime cheesecake and baked chocolate cake this afternoon to get the creative juices flowing a bit better!! This is an aspect of church which is feeling good at the minute - our church is going through a tough period at the minute with lots of pressure on relationships as well as growth meaning that aspects of our work and outreach are under pressure. We had a great time on Sunday night with our youth cell - Giraffe - who hosted a surprise birthday party for one of the group...house full of teenagers, food, party popper debris and silly games...real good fun!

So, even if my life seems a bit boring from the outside, or from a blog perspective - I'm quite enjoying it...the lull before the storm!

weight update

well, despite 3 weeks in America with little or no thought to restraint, I managed to maintain my weight. I also, amazingly lost a pound during Falcon Camp where my main diet was porridge, cooked breakfast, sandwiches and crisps and a full cokked dinner with chips and stuff on the side. I think the nervous energy of keeping an eye on 22 tweenagers and 10 leaders probably helped. So, I'm now at 14 stone 9lb and starting afresh with the new academic year!

We had an amazing time in America, such a great time away with one another as a little family of 3 and also with great friends and making new ones. We loved New York, but everyone does really (I've been before and it was fun to show Andy round) but we really loved Tennessee, which was a bit of a surprise. Beautiful scenery, river, cool dinky city of Knoxville and lots of culture with food, arts, history and music abounding.

It really was back to earth with a bump last Tuesday, especially as I had picked something up on plane and am suffering with the after effects of sinusitis which is pretty pants and I feel like my head is full of tissue.

So, we're back with renewed vigour, ready to take on the challenges of life, work, church and all that God has in store! It's good to be home (but we quite liked America too!!)

weight watchers....bring it on!!

I have finally done the deed and joined weight watchers. Since having Matilda, I have used the excuse of baby weight to justify the tummy and the jelly legs and other unnecessary excesses. But for various reasons I can't hide behind that anymore (not least cos she is 18 months old now and I'm still eating like I'm pregnant!) so despite it being a bad time of year with kids camps and holidays in America looming, I've just got to get on with it and change my eating habits.

So, I intend to give a slightly different angle at times to this blog and just chart my journey to my ideal weight - hopefully. I am realistic enough to know it's not going to be easy but if I don't want to write about it I won't. But I think it will help me to be accountable to anyone who reads this (does anyone??!) and to myself when I read stuff back.

The initial weigh in was 14 stone, 12 lb. Horrific but not a total surprise as I had been subtly weighing myself at home, but telling myself the scales weren't accurate! My first goal is 10% off, getting down to 13st 6lb.

So far so good, I haven't felt hungry and even when I've had a couple of dodgy moments at a staff lunch on Tuesday (which was Day 1 of WW!) but I can trawl it back with dinner which is a bonus. I am point counting, which I think is good for us as we do cook a lot from scratch so can keep a check on the added extras and sauces etc. - and not use them! I'm trying to cut down on the caffeine, gradually and eating more fruit. Milk is my biggest problem so far - I hate skimmed milk! I'll get used to it but I don't drink a lot of milk anyway...The advantage, as far as I can see at the moment, of WW is that you don't have to cut out everything. I had half a choc cookie tonight with my cuppa and that was enough - and only 2 points. My cuppa and a treat is something I look forward to at the end of the day so knowing I can still have that is positive, feeling deprived is not likely to help me stick to a diet!

Check back on Tuesday when I get weighed again and I'll let you know how I get on!

vicks

Thanks to a combination of rest, prayer and a bit of a kick up the backside, I am feeling better in myself today...it's been a good day I think!

I said on Friday night at the Celebration of Youth Ministry that I love my job - and that is very true. I love it's variety, it's simplicity (it's irrelevant sometimes that I am an Anglican youth worker, cos youth work just matters, whatever your denomination!), it's range of expressions. I met with a new vicar in Chelmsford to talk about her parish, the young people who serve on a Sunday and how best to provide for them with relevant activities. Just an initial visit, but sometimes you just know it won't be the last!

I also had one of my favourite parts of the job today - the gathering of youth workers, full and part timers and available volunteers from across the Area for chat, coffee, prayer and Bible study. A really wonderful 90 minutes just to be together and share a small snippet of our lives. As a people person, I appreciate and feast upon those interactions and they continue to keep me going now as I am holed up in my office doing a presentation for a Deanery Synod for tomorrow!

So, before I crack on with that, just a couple of funny stories...firstly, Matilda has gone to bed this evening with Vicks Vapour Rub on her feet, followed by socks and finally with her sleepsuit over it all - why you ask?! We read somewhere that is the most effective way for the vapours and the clearing effect to work it's way through her system - bit like reflexology! Let's hope it works otherwise she might be traumatised for life!

Second story - part of the meltdown over the weekend was about chores and keeping the house running...so while standing in Tesco's today paying for a load of fruit, veg and milk for the week, I got a text from Andy saying that he had just purchased the exact same list - so we are well stocked! From no food to complete excess! Maybe it's time for a detox diet to get it all eaten!